“FDR: American Badass!” Is The Best Of All The “President Versus Nazi Werewolves” Movies

01.17.12 Written by RoboPanda

Why yes, that is FDR in a weaponized wheelchair.

It was just a short while ago that artist Jason Heuser made paintings of American presidents fighting classic monsters, and one of his paintings was a battlemech Franklin Delano Roosevelt which he also turned into the fake movie poster to the right. What he probably didn’t know was that his poster was very close to Hollywood truth, as FDR: American Badass! is a real movie coming out this year (four swearword-filled videos below).

The movie synopsis — which I couldn’t have made up no matter how many Four Lokos I chugged — is, “FDR rides a ‘wheelchair of death’ to stop the world from werewolves who carry the polio virus, including werewolf versions of Hitler, Mussolini, and Emperor Hirohito.

This concept has turned into a movie inexplicably starring Golden Globe winner Barry Bostwick (who would strike the Sun if it insulted him), Ray Wise, Kevin Sorbo (“Hercules”), the landlady from Kingpin, and Tom Cruise’s cousin. Even though their official website expired last month and I’ve never heard of the writer or director (Ross Patterson and Garrett Brawith, respectively), I still suspect this isn’t just an elaborate practical joke based on the number of well-known actors involved and the number of set pieces used in the red band trailer. Also, I so badly want this to be real based on this line of dialogue alone:

“A werewolf attacked you. It bit your leg. It release a small stream of . . . You’ve got the polio, Frank.”

“Does my c*ck still work?”

Mister President! Such salty language. Speaking of which, the trailer and three promos below are full of salty language, so get your headphones up and your Four Loko at the ready. FDR has to have his Loko, son.

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Is Guy Ritchie Back To Directing Sgt. Rock?

07.14.11 Written by Jon

With all the press that superheroes get, it’s sometimes easy to forget that there are other types of comic books like “romance” or the ever-popular “American-G.I.s-blow-the-hell-out-of-Nazis” genre. Well, it looks like we might finally get another film in that last genre (apart the from Captain America: The First Avenger), as Twitch Films is reporting that Guy Ritchie has signed back onto the adaptation of the classic DC war comic Sgt. Rock.

Now, Hollywood’s been trying to put together a film version of everyone’s favorite cigar-chomping sergeant since way back in the 80′s. Back then, John Milius (Conan: The Barbarian, Red Dawn) and David Peoples (Blade Runner, Ladyhawke) both wrote scripts and the film was planned to be an Arnold Schwarzenegger vehicle. (In those versions, Sgt. Rock was changed from “Frank Rock” to German-American “Karl Rocklen” to better fit Arnie’s Austrian accent.)

Ritchie signed onto the latest version, written by John Cox (Boot Camp), back in 2009, only to leave the project shortly thereafter. He was replaced by director Francis Lawrence (I Am Legend), who reportedly wanted to change the setting from WWII Europe to a war set in the future. But if Ritchie has signed on, we may be back to getting the classic Nazi-killing flick Sgt. Rock deserves.

[Twitch Film]

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New Footage From Moon Nazi Movie “Iron Sky”

05.13.11 Written by RoboPanda

More cast photos available here.

We’ve been following Iron Sky‘s progress since December of ’09 and it appears the Mooninite Nazis are here to stay, and they’ve added Udo Kier to the cast (finally). We’ve posted a couple pre-production teasers before (here and here), but today we have actual scenes from the movie.

Also in this trailer is the film’s official release date: April 4th 2012. The creators of Iron Sky are presenting a new promo at this year’s Cannes Film Festival, and it should be interesting to read the crowd’s reaction. [io9]

Finnish director Timo Vuorensola filmed the movie in Germany and the Australian outback, financing part of the production with crowdsourced funds.  Producer Tero Kaukomaa of Blind Spot Pictures tells QuietEarth they’ve raised nearly half a million euros (~$711,000) from crowd investing, which included their campaign in which fans can pay what they want ($1.50 minimum) to get an early look at the first five minutes of the film.  The clip below, however, costs nothing.  Although if you want to stuff some singles in our belts, we aren’t going to stop you.  It makes us nostalgic about our pre-blogging careers.

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Propaganda Posters In Favor Of Punching Nazi Dinosaurs In The Face

03.21.11 Written by RoboPanda



Finally, a cause I can fully get behind!  Punching Nazi dinosaurs in the face!  Yes!  Let’s do this.

Dino D-Day started as a Half Life 2 mod (trailer here) which tells the fascinating true story about that time Nazis resurrected dinosaurs and you have to fight them as an Allied soldier in WWII.  Now it’s been adapted as a full-length multiplayer game (trailer and synopsis here) which will release on April 8th.  It just became available for pre-order on Steam at a 10% discount.

You can still punch dinosaurs in the face as in all my daydreams the Half Life 2 version, but the full version adds the option to play as six different Allied soldiers, three different Axis soldiers, or three Nazi dinosaurs, one of whom is a Desmatosuchus with a 20mm cannon strapped to its back.  It is super effective.

Hit the jump for screencaps from the game (via Steam) and propaganda posters (via Destructoid, who have additional posters in their gallery).

(Click pictures for full size)

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Dinosaurs Are Real, and the Nazis Have Them

12.06.10 Written by RoboPanda

Last year we posted a trailer for the awesome Half Life 2 mod, “Dino D-Day”, in which you play an Allied soldier fighting against dinosaurs resurrected and trained by Nazis. 100% historically accurate. Now here’s the fantastic news: there’s going to be a full, multi-player Dino D-Day game, releasing March 1st, 2011 (trailer below).  Not only can you punch dinos in the face as in the Half Life 2 mod, but you can also play as a dinosaur, including a Desmatosuchus with a 20mm cannon strapped to its back. As you do.

Punch my dinosaur in the face with an official synopsis, dinodday:

The Allied side includes six playable characters each with unique weapons and abilities to use in combat. Gun down a Dilophosaur with your trusty M1 Garand, blast a kamikaze pterosaur out of the sky with your Thompson sub-machine gun, toss out a dead jack rabbit to lure a raptor into a trap. As an Axis player you will have your choice of three human classes and three dinosaur classes. Ambush your enemy with speed and stealth as the Raptor, mercilessly pound the enemy with the Desmatosuchus’ heavy 20mm gun, rampage through enemy groups as the Dilophosaur, pick up a body and throw it at an enemy for a double kill! The German soldier classes are the perfect complement to their dinosaur comrades.
You’ve played World War II games before…but have you played a World War II game with dinosaurs?

More important question: have you ever played a World War II game with dinosaurs on weed?  Find the answer to this and other similar questions in my new book, The Bigass Book of Movie References From 1998.

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Space Nazi Movie Begins Filming. Really.

12.02.10 Written by RoboPanda

We hate mooninite Nazis, but we love reporting news about mooninite Nazi flick Iron Sky, which has started filming in Frankfurt, Germany. After four weeks of shooting in Germany, Finnish director Timo Vuorensola will move the crew to Australia, a fitting stand-in for the desolate moonscape as long as they CGI out all the kangaroos wearing sunglasses (they’re everywhere down there).  When last we wrote about the film, they were raising money with a YouTube campaign.  They raised 15% of their $8.5 million budget from 52 internet donors, and their fundraising activity continues:

In keeping with their DIY roots, the filmmakers launched a campaign to get their picture into theaters through the online Demand to See Iron Sky campaign. Producers also invite potential fans to pay what they want, starting at 1 euro (about $1.50) to grab a sneak peek of the film’s first five minutes. [Wired]

$1.50 for five minutes?  It better tell me what it’s wearing.

Set photos and video from the first day of shooting after the jump:


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