As I’ve mentioned before, I’m more into Star Trek than Star Wars. Why? Well, for one, the Trek fanbase just seems a little more rational — a little less, I dunno, constantly enraged about nothing.

Case in point, every time Lucas goes back and replaces some musty old puppet or terrible stop-action animation with CGI, Star Wars fans howl and rend their clothing like somebody has just thrown turpentine on the Mona Lisa. Star Trek fans on the other hand don’t really get that fussed about that kinda stuff. Every time an old Star Trek series is released in a new format they re-do the effects, and Trekkies just sort of shrug and go “hey yeah, that does look better. Cool.”

Also Star Wars guys all fly their spaceships all uptight like “traveling through hyperspace ain’t like dusting crops!” while Star Trek guys are all leeeaning back in their easy chairs and being all “Warp 5 Number One”.

Anyways, enough “Star Wars and Star Trek people” from my stand-up routine. Hit the jump to check out a video of what The Next Generation will look like on Blu-ray…

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Every year we post several geeky parody valentines before Valentine’s Day. Yes, we’re a couple weeks early, but that’s not because it’s an absurdly slow news day and I’ve been starting one-sided arguments with my cat all morning to pass the time. No, that’s just a normal Tuesday. The real reason we’re posting these early is to give you time to acquire some of them for the ones you love, the ones you just sort of like, and the ones you start arguments with just to have something to do.

Last year’s valentines can be viewed here, and the year before last’s are here. (UPDATE: 40 new cards here.) Read on for the 35 we picked for this year’s gallery:

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Have you ever watched an old episode of Star Trek and upon seeing the Enterprise majestically soaring through space thought “hey, I wish I could rest my drinks and old copies of US Weekly on that“?

Well, apparently that thought came to Barry Shields, because he went and built himself an Enterprise-shaped coffee table. A glass coffee table at that. Cuh-lassy. Want it? You can buy it right here, provided you have $3,100 worth of gold-pressed latinum kicking around.

You know, if I had the money I’d consider buying the Enterprise table if ol’ Barry could promise to make me matching Romulan and Klingon warbird ones. Some people dream of winning the lottery and buying fancy cars and flashy houses — I dream of spending my days crashing my Star Trek coffee tables together while making phaser noises.

via Technabob

Remember a couple years ago when that story about a guy turning his apartment into a Star Trek set made the rounds? His name was Tony Alleyne…you know, this guy…

Yeah, we all had a good chuckle. Trekkies secretly envied him. A lot of “man, wonder what his WIFE thinks of THIS, ho ho!” jokes were made. Wellll…turns out she, shockingly, doesn’t think much of it.

Tony’s wife is divorcing him, and she owns the apartment and wants to sell it, so sadly Tony is going to have to put his toys back in the box and go play with them someplace else. Tony says it would take nearly 150 thousand dollars remake his Trek apartment, but I have faith he can do it all again. You’d be surprised how much money you can save when you cut things like “women”, “sex”, and “leaving your Star Trek apartment” out of your life.

Honestly, I always knew nothing good would come of Tony’s Trek apartment. I mean, he based his designs on Star Trek Voyager. Voyager. That’s like building yourself a Star Wars house and basing it on Holiday Special. Voyager is good for one thing though — giving me an excuse to post Seven of Nine’s boobs. You’re welcome.

Not even these could make Voyager watchable.

via The Daily What

Ever wonder about the second-stringers of the Federation? You know, the guys who don’t violate the Prime Directive all the time, who negotiate peace treaties, who escort diplomats, who do their jobs quietly and effectively? The ones we only care about when they go nuts, get their ship wiped out by an alien parasite, or stumble onto the Negative Space Wedgie of the week and get killed? Those guys?

Kevin Church and Ming Doyle do, and they’ve launched the funniest Star Trek tribute we’ve seen in a long time, Boldy Gone.

There are two things that stand out about “Boldly Gone”. First, the art manages to evoke classic “Trek” while still retaining its own style. Secondly, the writing, while funny, is already full of nice touches. Our lead sad sack, Captain Meredith, isn’t an incompetent idiot; he’s just competent, and resents that showboating d-bag Kirk. And the first strip alone has a punchline that’s simultaneously deeply nerdy and hilariously unexpected.

In other words, if you love “Trek”, give this a read.

So, it looks like somebody out there can read my dreams. How else to explain the fact that they’re making a Star Trek Settlers of Catan game? They’ve pretty much nailed the center of my personal nerd Venn diagram with this one.

Anywho, the game takes your typical themed board game approach — all the regular pieces have somewhat awkwardly been replaced with Star Trek themed ones. Not the most creative approach, but still — now you can trade Dilithium instead of gold! A Klingon Bird of Prey replaces the thief! Those of you who aren’t Trekkies or into German board games may not know what I’m talking about, but trust me, this is all very exciting.

Now all they have to do is make a Jurassic Park version of Carcassonne and I can die happy knowing all my favorite nerd obsessions and German strategy games have found happiness with one another.

via Geekosystem